Projection of Abuse

Tearful Rags Andrea
I recently made a major move to a new home. In the process I came across these two old friends of mine -- Rags Andrea and Tet Bear (yes “Tet.”) I was not interested in dolls as a child but I anthropomorphized stuffed animals; Rags was the exception. What I found striking is I had drawn tears on Rags’ face. She is also stained with my own tears. It is so obvious I was projecting my sadness onto her. I did this with my pet dog as well; I treated her poorly, yelled at her, then asked her forgiveness.

My mother (the amazing seamstress) made Rags’ new dress -- the old one had literally disintegrated. I have no recollection of my mother making a single comment to me re: why Rags’ was crying. It also seems I put a happy face on her; why I don’t know. I suppose it reflects the dual nature of my survival instinct -- deep sadness and fear combined with a “happy” exterior -- the false face which was safer to project in my mother’s presense.

I also had a dollhouse, but it was likewise inhabited by animals. A small mouse was the matriarch of the family, but she was not married. She had a live-in companion.

Children are far more observant than adults give them credit for. Read More...